i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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