it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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