How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
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