he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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