u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Randomize
