After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
