Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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