walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
