Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
