i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Hippo gnu deer
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize