You just made me feel so damn special
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Randomize
