is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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