i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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