Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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