we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
