How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
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