"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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