Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
