you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
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