He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
