Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
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And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
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At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
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