I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
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