dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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