Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
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I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
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Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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