everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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