Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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