just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
