this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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