Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
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her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
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Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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