its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
