Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
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