Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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