Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
