I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
