For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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