She's like a pop up book from hell.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
