i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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