I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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