He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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