awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
