I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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