Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
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