He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Every concussion has its silver lining
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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