I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I said "one day" and that day is not today
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
