Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
This beer is not sobering me up at all
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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