i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
