Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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