I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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