Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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