She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize